Saliva Drug Test – A Cautionary Tale

Dee — Mon, 26 May 2008 05:46:01 +0000

A saliva drug test is a lot easier to pass than any other kind of drug test, so there’s really no excuse for failing one. But I have a sad story about someone who managed to fail one anyway, and I think it’s a good cautionary tale. It was a situation that could have been avoided SO easily – if this guy had only taken his saliva drug test more seriously.

Ryan’s Saliva Drug Test Fiasco

This all happened a couple of months ago. Ryan bought my e-book on a Monday, and he had a pre-employment drug test coming up on Thursday that same week. The reason I know this is because he emailed me on that Monday with a question after he read my e-book.

Turns out he was having a combination drug test and physical. Ryan’s lab appointment was for 8 a.m. on Thursday, and he mentioned that the instructions he’d been given said for him not to eat or drink anything after 10 p.m. the night before, except for water, plain coffee or plain tea. For some reason (I have no idea why) this made him absolutely certain that he was going to be given a piss test, and he had some questions about that. In his email he didn’t mention anything about passing a saliva drug test, and I could tell it wasn’t on his mind at all.

Weird Saliva Test Requirement?

Now, before this happened I’d never heard of someone being told not to eat or drink anything before coming in for their drug test, so it’s obviously pretty rare. And from everything I know about how to pass a drug test (which is a lot), there’s no hard evidence that what you eat makes a bit of difference in any drug test method. But knowing what I know specifically about how saliva drug tests work, common sense told me that the only possible test it might be required for would be a mouth swab.

So I emailed Ryan back right away and I told him that although I didn’t have any direct knowledge of this requirement, I was 99% certain that he needed to follow the method I give for beating a saliva drug test. I also told him he could prepare for a urine test at the same time if it would make him feel more secure, since the two methods don’t interfere with each other in any way. But it’s just SO EASY to pass a saliva test if you prepare for it, so I really tried to get across to him that he needed to do this, just in case I was right. (And I also reassured him that it is impossible for labs to detect when someone uses the methods I give, so he didn’t need to worry about that.)

A Saliva Test Horror Story…

Well, you can probably already see where this is going. Yup, sure enough, he was given a saliva drug test – which he hadn’t done any preparation for AT ALL – and he failed his test. I have no idea why he didn’t take my advice. False confidence? Maybe a touch of laziness? He sent me another email after he got his test results and admitted that he was a complete idiot for not listening to me. But this is one time when I really would have preferred to be wrong, because he missed out on a really good job as a result of all this.

So, long story short, Ryan and I kept in touch and fortunately things did eventually work out for him I’m happy to say. He finally got another job offer about a week ago, AND he had to pass another drug test. But this time they told him upfront that he was getting a urine test, so he followed the instructions in my e-book for that (again) and passed with no problem. He sounds pretty happy with the job he ended up with, but I don’t think he’d want to go through all that grief again if he had it to do over.

So what’s the moral of poor Ryan’s story? Just that even if passing a saliva drug test is really easy, you MUST take them seriously, folks. You and I know that it’s complete insanity for employers to be wigged out about the humble weed, but the fact is that there are a lot of insane people who pull the strings and decide who gets hired and who gets to keep their job. And like I said before – this sooo did not have to happen, because a saliva drug test is so freakin’ easy to pass.

How To Pass A Saliva Drug Test – The Easy Way

You want to know just how easy it is? Most smokers (not all, but most) can beat a mouth swab test just by not smoking for a few days. But there’s an exception to every rule, and for some reason a few random people will test positive for as long as a few weeks (my guess is it probably has something to do with diet, and not eating healthy). So to make sure you’re not one of the exceptions, I’d still recommend picking up a home test and using it right before your lab appointment, to find out where you stand.

p.s. By the way – if a lab ever gives you instructions not to eat or drink before you go in for a saliva test, JUST IGNORE THEM. They’re only asking because they want to get the most accurate results possible. So if your goal is beat a saliva drug test, why help the lab?

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How To Pass A Drug Test – It Ain’t Rocket Science

Dee — Sat, 15 Sep 2007 03:17:45 +0000

How to pass a drug test is both super hard and super easy. It’s hard if you can’t manage to shut out all the marketing hype that tries to scare you into buying expensive, unreliable ‘detox’ products. But if you can stay calm and focused, and use your common sense, then how to pass a drug test becomes an easy, logical, step-by-step process.

How to Pass a Drug Test – The UA

Most people who need to know how to pass a drug test are taking urine tests (also called a urinalysis, or UA). I have to take a whiz quiz every six months myself. If you have to take urine drug tests yourself, here’s the bottom line: the only reliable method for how to pass a urine test is by diluting, and then taking steps to hide the fact that you’re diluting from the testing labs. THERE. I just saved you hours of searching and a big heap of money for something that probably would have made you fail anyway.

How to Pass a Drug Test – A Quick Guide to Dilution

And how do you hide the fact that you’re diluting from the drug testing lab? Simple. Take a whole bunch of B-complex so your urine will look yellow, and also drink a ton of Gatorade so that your urine passes the ‘gravity’ portion of the drug test. The reason for that is because when you drink a ton of water your pee doesn’t have the same weight it normally would, and drinking Gatorade is one way to correct that. It just needs to fall within certain parameters to be considered normal, and although not all labs test for urine density, you have no way of knowing ahead of time if the one you’re going to does or not.

There ya have it. The secret of how to pass a drug test. Believe me, passing a drug test isn’t rocket science, and people do it every single day using some variation of this exact same method.

How to Pass a Drug Test for Saliva

Beating saliva drug tests is easy too. Maybe even easier. For one thing, they have a really short detection period, unlike urine drug tests. If you know you have to pass a saliva drug test a week ahead of time, you can just stop smoking for a week and you’ll be clean by the time you take your test. But if you don’t have a week, you can probably still pass by cleaning out your mouth super, super good (including under your tongue), flossing, and swishing for a long time with a non-alcohol mouthwash.

The Bottom Line About How to Pass a Drug Test

Save your money and don’t buy expensive ‘secret formula’ detox products, because they’re big on marketing hype but short on actual delivery of info on how to pass a drug test. They may offer you a 500% refund if you fail, but don’t let that sucker you into believing their products are reliable methods for passing a drug test – they’re not. Because of the fact that THC is stored in your fat cells, a ‘cleanser’ that works on your kidneys or liver or whatever is completely useless. To those companies, it’s just a numbers game. They know that enough people will pass their drug test to keep them in business, and they don’t give a rat’s ass about the people who end up failing. Just go hang out on a pot forum and read all the sad stories of people who wasted tons of money and failed their test anyway.

How to pass a drug test really isn’t any big secret. It’s just a matter of sticking with what actually works, instead of getting panicked and gambling your future on detox products made by companies that won’t even tell you how they work.

How to Pass a Drug Test 420.org » How to Pass a Drug Test – Practical Information and Advice