How To Pass A Urine Test

Thu, May 29, 2008

Urine Drug Tests


How to pass a urine test is pretty straightforward, but I’m constantly amazed by all the false information that’s out there being passed around. But if you’re feeling desperate about finding a way to pass a drug test, I can understand why you might be tempted to go with something that ‘sounds good.’ And especially if this is your first time being tested, it can be really hard to tell the good info about how to pass a urine test from the bad.

Sometimes I feel like a preacher or something, I swear. But instead of getting up on a pulpit to rant about fire and brimstone and the wages of sin, I’m on a soapbox trying to get through to people that dilution is the only reliable way to pass a urine test. And instead of fighting Satan, my nemesis is a Mountain of Misinformation.

An Important Fact About Passing a Urine Test With Dilution

What about you? Have you heard about dilution and then just dismissed it as yet another weird theory about how to pass a urine test? Well, before you write it off, think about this: you know those detox drinks you can buy? That’s exactly how they work: DILUTION, plain and simple. Yes, I KNOW they claim to ‘cleanse’ your system, blah, blah, blah. But the harsh scientific reality is that you can’t detoxify your body to get rid of THC in a hurry – all you can do is temporarily detoxify your urine by flushing your kidneys with water. So the only thing detox drinks actually cleanse is your wallet, regardless of their marketing hype.

How Detox Drinks Work

When you read the directions on any commercial detox drink, every single one tells you to drink lots of water before drinking it. The reason why is because those companies know the truth – that dilution is the only way to pass a urine test in a hurry. But a good sales pitch can make common dirt sound like the answer to your prayers, so they have to make you believe that their products contain some secret potion that can miraculously wash THC out of your system. But the reality is that it’s the water you drink that temporarily ‘washes’ the THC out of your kidneys. All a detox drink does is provide you with the supplements you need in order to hide the fact that you’re diluting from the testing lab.

The Pros & Cons of Using a Detox Drink to Pass a Urine Test

Which isn’t to say that detox drinks never work, because they often do. The big problem with them is that they’re just not very reliable. They’re a one-size-fits-all solution for the average person, and because everyone’s metabolism is different, you just have no way of knowing in advance if you’re going to be average enough for them to work for you. In most cases you’re way better off just buying the same ingredients that are in those things and custom-making your own ‘detox drink’ at home. Every single ingredient in those drinks is something you can buy yourself in any health food store or major pharmacy.

Another good reason for making your own detox drink is that it gives you a chance to test yourself before taking your real test. With a commercial detox drink you don’t get a second chance, unless you buy a couple of them at fifty bucks or more a pop. Making your own happens to be a hell of a lot cheaper than buying a commercial drink, but I think for most people that’s not really a big consideration. After all, if you lose your job because you didn’t pass a urine test then it won’t really matter how much money you saved.

There’s information about how to make your own detox drink plastered all over this website, and a good place to start is by reading the tips in this post. But if you’re in a hurry and you just want it all in one place, then you might want to check out my ebook about how to pass a drug test.

But one damn good argument in favor of commercial detox drinks is that they’re just so easy. You drink lots of water and then chug down the bottle right before you go in for your urine test. Period, you’re done. If you pass, you just saved yourself some hassle. Making your own home brew means you have to buy the individual ingredients that will mask your dilution, and then you have to keep track of what you’re taking and how much water you’re drinking. So, some people just may not want to deal with it. I don’t recommend taking a chance on a commercial drink if you have a probation test, or if you absolutely, positively have to keep/get a job. But if failing your test wouldn’t be the end of the world, then I can see where someone might want to just get a commercial detox drink and be done with it. I’m so used to making my own brew now that I don’t have to think about it, but I think for some people it would just be too much of a hassle. I guess it just depends on your desperation level.

Home Remedies That Won’t Help You Pass a Urine Test

One thing I get asked about a lot is Sure-Jell, or Certo (same thing). Of all the home remedies out there about how to pass a drug test I think this is one of the most dangerous, because it actually does appear to work sometimes. But you know what? Whenever I’ve talked to someone that passed with Sure-Jell, every single person has told me that they also diluted. But most of the people I’ve talked to who used Sure-Jell didn’t pass, either because they didn’t dilute at all, or because they diluted too much and the testing lab failed them for it. If you’re thinking about using this method because someone you know passed with it, ask them to tell you exactly what steps they used. I bet you discover the same thing I did.

Another theory about how to pass a urine test that you’ve probably read about is taking huge amounts of niacin – and this one really makes me crazy. Not only is it useless for passing a drug test, you can actually cause permanent damage to your liver if you overdose on it. Which isn’t that hard to do when you’re taking like 100 times or more the recommended daily dose. This one got started years ago from a book written by the late L. Ron Hubbard (the founder of Scientology). The book was about a purification/detoxification program for drug addicts, among other things. I’m not saying niacin isn’t an important vitamin, but Hubbard thought it could basically cure cancer and save the world. But um, last I checked the guy never got any degrees in medicine or nutrition, so his advice is based on his opinion alone, not fact. And then there’s that whole Scientology thing. That’s all I’ll say about that

And then there are other miracle cures: cranberry juice (diuretic, just makes you pee more), vinegar (changes the PH of your urine), etc. etc. etc. You get the idea. Believe me, I know it’s overwhelming when you see how much wildly different information there is on the net about how to pass a drug test. You’d think it’d be easy to find out, but man, it is not. In the end it comes down to an entirely personal decision, but when it comes to specifically how to pass a urine test, I hope I’ve at least given you some food for thought. I’m not saying there’s not good information out there, but before you choose a method to go with just take everything you read with a grain of salt, verify your sources, and above all, ask lots of questions.

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448 Responses to “How To Pass A Urine Test”

  1. ResinBalls Says:

    okay yall, from what i gather here dilution is the best method….makes perfect sense u take the vitamin Bs for color and creatine a day before so ur within the correct perameters. I test every 3 weeks for probation and its in a lab so they measure creatine and ph levels. I have smoked some mad medicinal chronic after my tests, then stay clean for at least 2 weeks, used the detox drink NC Strip and passed twice. this time i’m going to try dilution. what i want to know is will the gel stuff stop thc metabolites from being excreted into my urine sample? and why the fuck would these anit-pot douche bags comment with such negativity? your boss is probly a stoner and so is your daughters school bus driver dumb fuck get a life and go criticize the red-necks cooking meth at your neighbors house!

    Reply

  2. EmberMoon Says:

    I followed the exact same method as cameron and it worked for me too!
    Saved my @$$!

    Reply

  3. Capn Says:

    What method was it? I have a test coming up I can stop atleast two days before my test maybe three, what’s the best way

    Reply

  4. Anonymous Says:

    work out…
    lots of exercise
    fruits & shit
    pretty much everything thats good for your body, do it
    except the best one, gettin high

    Reply

  5. Bill Says:

    HOW DUMB ARE YOU GUYS!!?!!.. NO EXERCISE!!!.. THC is fat soluble rather then water soluble. Meaning its stored in your fat cells.. Exercise causes this to realease from your fat cells into your bloodstream.. This is will only help make you fail.. If you have a test in 2 months or something, it may be a good idea to try to get it totally out of your fat cells but I wouldnt recommend exercising alot within the week of the test.

    Reply

  6. joe Says:

    Don’t listen to Bill.

    Reply

  7. Anonymous Says:

    Dude, he’s right. If you work out a lot, you metabolize the THC more quickly. By working out the few days before the test, the THC metabolites are released from your fat stores and into your urine. DO NOT WORK OUT A FEW DAYS BEFORE THE TEST!

    Reply


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