How To Pass A Urine Test

Thu, May 29, 2008

Urine Drug Tests


How to pass a urine test is pretty straightforward, but I’m constantly amazed by all the false information that’s out there being passed around. But if you’re feeling desperate about finding a way to pass a drug test, I can understand why you might be tempted to go with something that ’sounds good.’ And especially if this is your first time being tested, it can be really hard to tell the good info about how to pass a urine test from the bad.

Sometimes I feel like a preacher or something, I swear. But instead of getting up on a pulpit to rant about fire and brimstone and the wages of sin, I’m on a soapbox trying to get through to people that dilution is the only reliable way to pass a urine test. And instead of fighting Satan, my nemesis is a Mountain of Misinformation.

An Important Fact About Passing a Urine Test With Dilution

What about you? Have you heard about dilution and then just dismissed it as yet another weird theory about how to pass a urine test? Well, before you write it off, think about this: you know those detox drinks you can buy? That’s exactly how they work: DILUTION, plain and simple. Yes, I KNOW they claim to ‘cleanse’ your system, blah, blah, blah. But the harsh scientific reality is that you can’t detoxify your body to get rid of THC in a hurry – all you can do is temporarily detoxify your urine by flushing your kidneys with water. So the only thing detox drinks actually cleanse is your wallet, regardless of their marketing hype.

How Detox Drinks Work

When you read the directions on any commercial detox drink, every single one tells you to drink lots of water before drinking it. The reason why is because those companies know the truth – that dilution is the only way to pass a urine test in a hurry. But a good sales pitch can make common dirt sound like the answer to your prayers, so they have to make you believe that their products contain some secret potion that can miraculously wash THC out of your system. But the reality is that it’s the water you drink that temporarily ‘washes’ the THC out of your kidneys. All a detox drink does is provide you with the supplements you need in order to hide the fact that you’re diluting from the testing lab.

The Pros & Cons of Using a Detox Drink to Pass a Urine Test

Which isn’t to say that detox drinks never work, because they often do. The big problem with them is that they’re just not very reliable. They’re a one-size-fits-all solution for the average person, and because everyone’s metabolism is different, you just have no way of knowing in advance if you’re going to be average enough for them to work for you. In most cases you’re way better off just buying the same ingredients that are in those things and custom-making your own ‘detox drink’ at home. Every single ingredient in those drinks is something you can buy yourself in any health food store or major pharmacy.

Another good reason for making your own detox drink is that it gives you a chance to test yourself before taking your real test. With a commercial detox drink you don’t get a second chance, unless you buy a couple of them at fifty bucks or more a pop. Making your own happens to be a hell of a lot cheaper than buying a commercial drink, but I think for most people that’s not really a big consideration. After all, if you lose your job because you didn’t pass a urine test then it won’t really matter how much money you saved.

There’s information about how to make your own detox drink plastered all over this website, and a good place to start is by reading the tips in this post. But if you’re in a hurry and you just want it all in one place, then you might want to check out my ebook about how to pass a drug test.

But one damn good argument in favor of commercial detox drinks is that they’re just so easy. You drink lots of water and then chug down the bottle right before you go in for your urine test. Period, you’re done. If you pass, you just saved yourself some hassle. Making your own home brew means you have to buy the individual ingredients that will mask your dilution, and then you have to keep track of what you’re taking and how much water you’re drinking. So, some people just may not want to deal with it. I don’t recommend taking a chance on a commercial drink if you have a probation test, or if you absolutely, positively have to keep/get a job. But if failing your test wouldn’t be the end of the world, then I can see where someone might want to just get a commercial detox drink and be done with it. I’m so used to making my own brew now that I don’t have to think about it, but I think for some people it would just be too much of a hassle. I guess it just depends on your desperation level.

Home Remedies That Won’t Help You Pass a Urine Test

One thing I get asked about a lot is Sure-Jell, or Certo (same thing). Of all the home remedies out there about how to pass a drug test I think this is one of the most dangerous, because it actually does appear to work sometimes. But you know what? Whenever I’ve talked to someone that passed with Sure-Jell, every single person has told me that they also diluted. But most of the people I’ve talked to who used Sure-Jell didn’t pass, either because they didn’t dilute at all, or because they diluted too much and the testing lab failed them for it. If you’re thinking about using this method because someone you know passed with it, ask them to tell you exactly what steps they used. I bet you discover the same thing I did.

Another theory about how to pass a urine test that you’ve probably read about is taking huge amounts of niacin – and this one really makes me crazy. Not only is it useless for passing a drug test, you can actually cause permanent damage to your liver if you overdose on it. Which isn’t that hard to do when you’re taking like 100 times or more the recommended daily dose. This one got started years ago from a book written by the late L. Ron Hubbard (the founder of Scientology). The book was about a purification/detoxification program for drug addicts, among other things. I’m not saying niacin isn’t an important vitamin, but Hubbard thought it could basically cure cancer and save the world. But um, last I checked the guy never got any degrees in medicine or nutrition, so his advice is based on his opinion alone, not fact. And then there’s that whole Scientology thing. That’s all I’ll say about that

And then there are other miracle cures: cranberry juice (diuretic, just makes you pee more), vinegar (changes the PH of your urine), etc. etc. etc. You get the idea. Believe me, I know it’s overwhelming when you see how much wildly different information there is on the net about how to pass a drug test. You’d think it’d be easy to find out, but man, it is not. In the end it comes down to an entirely personal decision, but when it comes to specifically how to pass a urine test, I hope I’ve at least given you some food for thought. I’m not saying there’s not good information out there, but before you choose a method to go with just take everything you read with a grain of salt, verify your sources, and above all, ask lots of questions.

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213 Responses to “How To Pass A Urine Test”

  1. Greg Says:

    I went to youreinluck.com and ordered some “quick fix.” It contained some synthetic urine in a bottle with a temperature strip already on the bottle and a heat warmer to keep the bottle warm. All the instrustions you will need is included. I personally didnt use the synthetic urine, I just got some urine from a friend who doesnt smoke. I didnt trust that synthetic urine it came with, it may work but i didnt want to chance it. I think “Quick Fix”its the best product invented to pass a piss test.

  2. Greg Says:

    Sorry for saying the quick fix comes with a heat warmer when its actually a hand warmer. It only comes with one but you can get more from any Wal-Mart in the camping department for about 2 dollars with six included. Good luck everyone

  3. Greg Says:

    My job does random test but i didnt want to stop smoking so i visited youreinluck.com and purchased an order of “quick fix.” It contains a bottle of synthetic(fake) urine with a temperature strip on the bottle as well as a hand warmer to keep the bottle warm. I think its the best way to pass a urine test. I personally didnt use the synthetic urine, I just got some clean piss from a friend because i didnt fully trust that fake piss but it may work, I didnt want to chance it. Good luck everyone and stay high

  4. steven Says:

    i dont want to know about marijuana i want to know what the quickest way to pass a drug test for opiates is that thing about putting bleach on your fingers and sticking them in the piss after if that really works or not please somebody that knows what they are talking about give me the most accurate answer that you can thankyou.

  5. dozer Says:

    drink a gallon of watter then a red bull and then pee till its yellow from the red bull. after that hold it till your ready.

  6. cameron Says:

    I was on probation for 8 months. 6 of those months I got piss tested, sometimes twice a month. I never quit smoking weed, passed every test. Here’s how:
    1. 36 hours before testing, stop smoking weed.
    2. The day before the test, eat a package of PROTOX JUMPSTART(6 capsules only $2) in the afternoon and when you go to bed.
    3. 5 hours before you test, eat a high fiber meal, eat your third pack of PROTOX JUMPSTART, and slam water(as much as possible)for next 2 hours. Piss as much as possible.
    4. 3 hours before test, drink a bottle of PROTOX ADVANCED FORMULA EXTREME STRENGTH -for large body mass-. Wait 15 minutes, fill empty bottle with water, shake an drink. Wait 30 minutes. No water no food no tobbacco.
    5. For next 2 hrs or so till you test, slam water. Take 4 or 5 big pisses before you test. Then test, and you will pass.

  7. quenton Says:

    theres another way niacin and drink water that actually flushes your system. the explanation is its a dietary supplemnet and it and it nurns ur fat cells which holds thc, toxins and the water flushes them out quicker learned it from a national guard recruiter

  8. quenton Says:

    to matt make sure they dont come in to the bathroom and put the urine sample bottlke under the sink under warm water for a few minutes

  9. Anonymous Says:

    hello my name is quentin i would like to knoe how can i pass a saliva test

  10. ??? Says:

    so this is gonna sound horrible but im pregnant and up until a little less then a week ago i was still smoking weed. not a hole lot but about a bowl a day maybe and i just recently moved back to lovely southern california to have my baby and get away from drugs n things but i have to find a new doctor and i know one of the things they are going to do is drug test me and im afraid if i dont get my system clean with in the next couple days before my appointment they will take my baby away. im not going to be a bad mom i just have made some very poor decisions and have just recently realized it. i feel completely horrible but i need help. i need to know a safe way to clean out my system with out harming my baby. ive done enough of that by smoking.

  11. Dee Says:

    mom-to-be,

    Send me an email via the contact form here on my website, and I’ll see what I can do to help.

    Dee

  12. ??? Says:

    dee,

    i would love to and have no clue how


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  1. [...] he knows exactly what he needs to do to get a false negative on a drug test, whether it’s a urine test or a saliva test. So, not only is he able to pass any drug test that gets thrown his way, he also [...]

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